After D, Before F

How can I show you the other side of me?
I am scared, alone, broken and battered.
You wouldn’t recognized what’s inside, the dark void of blackness that threatens to swallow me whole, the wild unkempt madness that lingers, that abides by no known rules.

I struggle to maintain the me that you know, what you see.
Smiled are filled with lies that cry tears heavy and pregnant when you’re not with me.
When I’m with you everything is not okay. When I’m with you, everything is okay.

I shudder at your thought of me.
Could you love me? Heart pulsating, happiness shattered; the future shows only pain. I wonder can I truly be yours? Tainted body and mind ripped from childhood to womanhood by adults looking for a fix. I wish I could be free from the scars of fires long gone, dampened by my body. I want to show you smooth lines and sharp colors fading into the explosion of my mind’s silhouette, the dream of what I can be.

You free me
you rob me
of the inhibition to deny myself anything that can make me happy
temporary sanity
for this moment I want you to take me
give me everything

Warm body
numbing finger tips
tingles in my spine
soft clothes against my skin
sweet lines
smooth speech
bright eyes
perfect smile
and that firm tug toward infinity
my estacy

Stop

Silky smooth

velvet on satin

warm

moist

tender

Ripe for the picking

please

 

I’m almost there

just a bit harder

I need you

Don’t

Take this away

driving me insane

you can take away

the pain

harder

stop

Please

Don’t

Stop

Touching me

Build me up

languid eruption

high mountains

sensitive peaks

Don’t stop baby

Brooklyn Boy

I never thought that I would fall for a brooklyn boy, all chocolate brown and sweet as pie.

 

Worldly knowledge and hood swagger

he can go from the new york times to

dealing with this crazy time .

Has a gentle touch, and rough hands

and swears he knows me like the back of his hand

 

Who’s this brooklyn boy that’s killing my composure?

He makes me feel, makes me think, makes me want,

makes me lose control.

 

He’s my weakness

the explosive in my foundation

My fata morgana

where the lack of my will resides

where my knees go weak at the though of his smile

and my heart refuses to beat

 

He’s fire and I’ll surely get burnt

like a peice of paper close to the flame

pulling back from the heat

but wanting to be the reason why it burns

at the same time

 

Burn me

Change me

Consume me

 

This brooklyn boy will surely be my downfall.

He stole my breath and left me panting for more.

Can he take my heart?